43 Fafunwa

Published on February 16th, 2012 | by thetoolsman

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43 Fafunwa Episode 13: One Of Those Days

It was an unusual evening at 43 Fafunwa for many reasons. Well, the few birds that were brave enough to hang around were still chirping, albeit cautiously for even they could sense that a certain force had taken over the building. There were no children making noise outside, the frontage of the building was surprisingly neat and even though Mr. Andrew was still seated in his usual position by the entrance listening to his transistor radio, one could easily gather from his countenance that something was different.

Abi person don die?

Surely she was going to die. If this continuous irritation and vomiting doesn’t kill her, her mother would definitely do it. Those were the thoughts on Doshima’s mind as she held the sides of her stomach and prayed no one was watching her. Even as exposed as she was for her age, she was confused. One thing was sure, she knew she was pregnant; she also knew she didn’t have to worry about an abortion for he had promised to marry her. He was her prince, her knight in shining armor and he was going to take her away from this crazy place, away to all those beautiful places he had told her about.

“Who is there?”

The knock on the toilet door brought her back to the present. She rinsed off her mouth with water from the pure water sachet she had been holding and then she walked out past an on looking Eddy.

What a waste. Off all the fine women in this compound, it’s that sister that he’s dying for. Doshima shook her head and thought maybe the Lord does work in mysterious ways as she walked towards the building half praying her mother would return late again.

****

Mr. Andrew had an unusual seriousness about him today. The way he held his radio, the way he sat in front of the compound with a small exercise book beside him and a pen in his hands. He looked like he was in a position of authority and he was enjoying every single second of it. He placed his radio on the bench he was sitting on as a young man who had driven a taxi to the front of the house walked towards him.

“Good evening Sir.”

“Yes, yes. Whati can I do for you?”

“I’m here for the interview sir.”

“Oh… ok. Wetini be your name.”

“My name is A-Zed sir.”

“A – what?”

“A-Zed sir… Azeez.”

Mr. Andrew’s hiss was loud and exaggerated.

“Are you a tout?”

“Sir?”

“I say are you a misicreant? You leave the butiful name your parents give you and you calli yourselfi A-Zed. You canti be serious.”

“I’m sorry sir. I’m very serious, it’s just the name most people call me.”

Mr. Andrew sent out another loud hiss.

“Did you bring alli your particulasi?”

“Particulars?”

“Yes, alli your ID cardi and all those tins. You know landlordi don’t want to give tout his room againi..”

“Oh, yes.. yes sir.”

“Oya sit down here and wait, landilordi will soon be ready for you.”

With  that, Azeez took a seat on the bench not too far from Mr. Andrew and he looked on as the old soldier picked up his radio and continued listening to voices even he couldn’t make out.

Don’t worry Azeez, we doubt anyone else can make out those voices.

Still outside the building, behind Azeez’s car, a beaming Mozilla turned off his engine as he parked his car and turned to the ‘charming’ lady seated beside him.

“Bet you know I have milzed you sha. I just wish tins turn out differently”

“Morufu…”

“No. Laide. No. Call me Crown. Mozilla Crown. Ori Ade ni tawon eleyi now. (this head is made for crowns)”

“You know I’ve told you I don’t like that name o. Mozilla bi ti bawo… Anyway, I was going to say thank you for coming to pick me at work and also buying me dinner. It was very thoughtful.”

“Oh no Laide, don’t mention… don’t mention. I mean, I mean what I say. I know I fuck up —“

“Morufu!!! Stop swearing.”

“I’m sorry, I mean, I mezzed up before bet now I’m ready for you. I still love you Olaide and it is our destiny to marry. See how God has bring us together again.”

Laide sighed heavily and leaned back in her seat as she reflected on what Mozilla said.

We don’t blame you sister Laide, those grammatical landmines require a lot of reflection.

“I need time Mozilla. I need time to think about it.”

“No problem, I will wait… ma kuku duro (I will wait).

Still just outside the building…

A visibly angry Ibiyemi got off an okada and began walking away almost immediately forgetting to pay the bike man. It took several loud calls of “Madam… madam” from the bike man before she realized this. This is all his fault she thought to herself as she paid the okada man and began walking towards the building.

Ha, see my life. Me, Ibiyemi. I have become like this because of one stupid boy. Ha! And that idiot that I’m looking after in the hospital too was raising his voice at me telling me I came late. God will judge all these men. As for this Eddy and his sister Laide, today na today. It’s either by fire or by force; one of them must confess what is going on today.

Almost immediately, Ibiyemi bumped into Sister Laide just as she was about walking into the building. Deep in her thoughts, Ibiyemi had been oblivious of what was going on around her and all she could hear now were words coming out of the mouth of Sparrow’s friend who apparently had been walking in with Sister Laide.

“Aunty take it easy o.”

“Sister Ibiyemi, is everything ok? You did not even see me at all. Brother Ifeanyi nko, I hope he’s ok?”

As if things couldn’t get worse, a fresh looking Eddy walked out of the building into the commotion and for a second he didn’t know how to react with both Laide and Ibiyemi staring at him.

Before he could talk, a running Doshima dashed through the small crowd and ran towards her father while Madam Wangerr did the best she could to catch up with her while screaming…

Ashaaaawo!!!!

Prostitute!!!

“In this same house! Doshima, you must confess today. You must tell me who did this to you.”

Did we say it was unusual? Ok, scratch that.

Madam Wangerrs deep voice rang through the entire building and in no time everyone was aware of the drama that was brewing in front of the house. Mr. Andrew had jumped off his bench and tried to protect Doshima who was now holding on firmly to the back of his shirt. Azeez had also gotten off the bench and tried to talk to the raging Madam Wangerr. Mozilla, Ibiyemi, Sister Laide and even Eddy were thoroughly engaged in the drama and waiting for answers.

Moments later, a visibly embarrassed landlord emerged from room two followed closely by a police officer, Mr. Alabi and a puffy faced Sparrow. It seemed the whole gang was now present.

Whoop whoop. Now this is Fafunwa (–____–)

“Una no just fit allow make person rest for this house abi.”

Sparrow spoke first… yeah, are we surprised?

“It is this small ashawo. They have impregnated her for me and she must tell me who did it today.”

Murmurs went through the crowd and the women around cast questioning glances at the male tenants present. Even Mrs. Alabi had come out with a seemingly healthy Kunle peeping behind her. Ifiok had also joined the crowd.

“So this is what you people do in my house abi. Oh. You see how good God is? Officer Banwo.”

The police office that had come out with the landlord responded.

“Yes sir.”

“I just finished interviewing him for the vacant room but even though I haven’t decided yet, you will do small work for us today. This little girl must tell us which mad man that impregnated her and you will help us arrest him for rape.”

More hushed talks went through the crowd and Mr. Andrew pushed a crying Doshima into the middle of the crowd and asked her to speak.

The moment of truth…

Doshima sniffed and wiped her tears as she looked round her audience. She took in a deep breath and was about to speak when he did…

“You people are just pathetic!”

The crowd turned around and standing behind them was Kevwe.

********************************

Thanks for stopping by people. This series will now pause here for a break but don’t worry, it’s definitely coming back. I’m @Thetoolsman and I co-write this series with @cikk0. If you’re new here, you can read up the old episodes here. We’ll be premiering another series Drug Diaries tomorrow at 10am, you don’t want to miss that. We always appreciate feedback so please use the comment box and drop us a line. Cheers.

Tags: #43f, Doshima, Madam Wangerr, Series, Sparrow

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thetoolsman Unrepentant media addict.

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