Published on August 13th, 2012 | by thetoolsman201
Leave Sex Alone
I am an alien. No, seriously, I am. My close friends will probably understand and agree with me but you guys just need to take my word for it. You won’t? Really?
Ok, here’s a question:
How many of y’all still talk to every single one of your exes? And by talk, I mean, have them on your BB, attend their birthdays, weddings and so on?
Ok, I see two hands, welcome to my world.
How strange is that? On a scale of 1 to alien? Maybe I’m not an alien, just this annoyingly adorable guy people just can’t stop talking to.
I was trying to get some work done the other day and I plugged in my earphones and hit play on my iTunes. First song that came on was a by Trey Songz off the Passion, Pain & Pleasure album. The tune had the lyrics:
And I wish we never did it.
And I wish we never loved it.
And I wish I never fell so deep in love with you
And now there aint no way we can be friends.
This got me thinking and I wondered just how many people must be in this situation. Something some describe as ‘complicated’; you know when you cross that dreaded friendship line and you dip your hands deep into the cookie jar. I don’t know where I got that analogy from but it seems to be a good example and maybe it’ll help us understand what really happens when sex comes into something that started out as pure friendship. According to most people, things just never seem to be the same again. So you dipped your hand into the jar, can’t you just bring it out, lick it clean and go on like nothing happened? I mean, I can think of several ways to get your hands cleaned if this happens.
You can either help yourself, lick your hands clean, get someone else to lick it or maybe even two or more people and then there are those times when she’s the one who licks your hands clean and then dips it into the jar again…and again.
*Sigh.. This analogy isn’t helping is it?
Why does sex have to change everything? This is the question. For a second there, I imagined asking my mother this question and I know she’ll pick her answer straight out of the bible and tell me the spiritual consequences of sex and then proceed to link it with the biological part in trying to answer me. I know all about that but today, I really want us to be as practical as possible.
Yes, sex is psychological, spiritual, emotional and all. I totally agree it goes beyond the physical. Once you’ve had sex with someone, a lot of things change; things beyond human understanding even and that’s why it can account for things like Okafor’s law but let’s be real guys, we are human beings, we have more control over our emotions than we think we do. Say what you will but I honestly don’t think sex is as powerful as we say it is. Ok, ok, not like that. Don’t get me wrong, sex can bring powerful men to their knees but I’m just saying, all this talk about sex changing everything is all bull as far as I’m concerned.
I know people regret sex and all but how many of y’all have ever said to yourselves: I wish we never had sex because I miss the friendship. Ok, I’m not asking the guys. Usually when you hear people say I wish we never had sex, it’s almost always followed by some bitter story of how everything turned sour after the sex. They‘ll make sure to skip all the details in-between like how they ‘failed to launch’ or how they laid there like a log of wood and just paint ‘sex’ the bad guy.
Poor sex, how can something so good get blamed for so much wrong? Forget all I said about being an alien and let’s be objective about this. Is it REALLY impossible to stay friends with an ex? If yes, how? If no, is it because sex changes everything…and why does sex change everything any way?
Save the church answers. You know the drill, use the comment box and speak your mind. Cheers.
Check out Episode 1 of The Ghen Ghen.. >