Published on June 7th, 2012 | by thetoolsman17
…And I have to live with the stigma
Hey people, Toolsman here. It’s been a ‘strange’ week here, especially after how our last weekend ended. The declared three days of mourning have now passed but unfortunately we are still mourning at 43 Fafunwa and as a result, we won’t be able to bring you this weeks episode but not to worry, we’ve got you covered. I got a message in the form of a short story and I’d like you guys to help the writer out with it ‘Efe style’. Please read through and see you on the flip side.
One sunny afternoon in July, as I walked down my street, running an errand for my mother, I heard my name. I just kept walking, thinking it was one of those random boys that guessed names to call people passing by. As I kept walking, angry that my name was so common that a stranger could get it right on first attempt, I heard my name again, louder this time. I turned, a rude expression on my face, to look at the person and stopped dead in my tracks. “Kayode!” I screamed, running across the street to jump on him and he was just cooing “Chichi” into my ears over and over again. He turned me around and told me how big I had become while I stood there, grinning from ear to ear.
Kayode is that boy I liked a lot back in high school, though he was classes ahead. I was so happy that I totally forgot all about my mother’s errand. We stood there, smiling and trying our best to catch up on old times with little success because of our excitement.
We exchanged numbers and promised to meet for lunch the following day. I barely slept through the night, getting up early to carefully select what to wear on my special date. After forcing myself to concentrate that morning, I dressed up, carefully applying my make up to enhance my beauty.
Looking in the mirror, I was satisfied with what I saw, picked my purse and headed to the restaurant we agreed on in a taxi. He was already there, watching me as I sauntered in. After about 2 hours of nibbling, blushing, gisting and teasing, we finally decided to leave. He offered to drop me at home and I was glad to spend some more time, just basking in his presence.
As I got out of his car, he asked if I won’t even give him a hug. I did and as we pulled apart, he planted a soft kiss on my lips. I was pleasantly surprised.
Then he said, “Chichi, I don’t want to rush you but I’m sure I want to be with you. I never got over you”. And he had this look that screamed sincerity. I smiled, bit my lip and told him we could date because I couldn’t get over him too. Back home, everyone kept asking what happened to me because I was just hyper and nothing got me pissed. One year down the line, Kayode and I were still head over heels and he decided to take me home to mama. I was nervous but he told me not to worry, that his mum is a very nice person and that if my family members liked him, why won’t his like me.
We entered their family house and he went to get his mum. She came out, greeted me warmly and I could see where Kay got his good looks. She asked questions and I answered and sometimes asked her follow-up questions. When I said I was leaving, she didn’t even want me to go. I was thinking how lucky I was to have this potential mother-in-law. All went well until the next afternoon when I got a call from Kayode that his mum didn’t want us together. She said a lot of bad things about my tribe, family and religious denomination. I was mad. So she led me on yesterday? What a good actress! I cried, asked God lots of unanswered questions, and lost focus at work…the list was endless.
Kayode was just as devastated. Then we came up with a plan. If I got pregnant, she won’t have a choice but to accept our union.
So I got pregnant and we didn’t tell Kayode’s mum until I was 6 months gone, just to ensure that D&C was not an option. Nothing my parents said could change my mind. When she finally heard, she was furious! Saying that I was a desperate prostitute and had bewitched her only son. The battle went on and on. I had our child and it was a beautiful lady-baby. We were all so happy…that is, everyone except my “mother-in-law”.
She didn’t even come for her first grandchild’s christening. A year went by and I started noticing changes in Kayode. He was always complaining of how he couldn’t live the rest of his life fighting his mother and things like that. He stopped calling regularly, seldom visited Simisola & I and would just lose his temper on any trivial issue. Not long after, he broke up with me, saying he needed to settle down with someone his parent would approve of and he was sorry for everything. He soon neglected his duties to our daughter and my heart broke the day I was holding a picture of Kayode and Simisola stuttered, “Dah-dah…where?”
I cried but it didn’t solve anything. I decided to lose myself to my job and my daughter. I’ve given up on love but Simisola is a constant reminder of how good my life could have been. Now, I have to live with the ‘stigma’ for the rest of my life.
Well, you’ve all read the story, you know the drill, use the comment box to share your thoughts. Also, the winner of the #43F Nokia Asha phone giveaway will be announced later today via our Twitter and Facebook pages. So goodluck to everyone who participated. Cheers.