Published on April 18th, 2012 | by thetoolsman64
One Night Only: Where Do You Stand On One-Night-Stands?
It was one of those days … everyone and everything just didn’t seem right and all I wanted to do was stay away from the world and their mother. But you know how these stories go. A couple of hours later, I was seating in my friends car heading to a mutual friend’s ‘birthday thingy’.
I almost closed my eyes in prayer as I thought to myself; at least, there’ll be food there and hopefully, good alcohol too. That was all I needed to get my displaced world back on track.
Nah… I was feeling a little too irritable to stand any form of unreasonable banter in the name of socializing. At least that was what I thought.
There were no trumpet sounds, no over-exaggerated ‘oooohhhs and ahhhhs’ when she walked in – maybe that’s why I didn’t notice her immediately but from that moment our eyes met, the trumpets didn’t stop playing in my head. It started with the clichéd “Hello” and we could both tell the end from that beginning.
About two hour after we met, I tore the foil of a condom wrapper with my teeth and indulged in my one and only one-night-stand – a.k.a jumpoff – ever.
She wasn’t the best I’d ever had – neither did she come in second or third. But it’s funny how you just kind of pull out all the stops when you somehow have it at the back of your mind that you may never ever get another shot. She wasn’t the most beautiful woman I had gotten with but there was just something about her. Her assertiveness was almost palpable. She was a woman who knew what she wanted and went for it.
The next morning, we got out of bed, chatted for a while, shared a cup of coffee and then she left. Never again has she graced the insides of my sheets with her presence.
Growing up, I remember reading in several novels how every woman’s greatest fantasy is having sex with a total stranger – the French Fling; lately I’ve been wondering if this still holds. Ten years ago, the thought of having a one-night-stand with a near stranger was not only vacuous; it was just down right irresponsible. With HIV and STDs on the rise then, there seemed to be a lot of awareness – at least in these parts.
Fast forward a few years and our human instincts seem to have gotten the better of us again. So what, there’s still HIV and STDs but we’ve got condoms now so game on? It’s funny how almost every other girl you meet nowadays talks about how she can’t ‘sleep with someone she doesn’t feel something for’ – it’s fast becoming a mantra and frankly, I don’t believe it; place facts against belief and the story is completely different.
Maybe it’s me, maybe my world is a little bit ahead but from experience and what I constantly hear, the sexual revolution of the 60’s has nothing on where we are right now. In researching this post, I spoke to a 20-year-old friend of mine and in her words:
“I can’t say I’m proud of it because I won’t lie, I’ve also said I will never sleep with a guy I don’t feel anything for but sometimes you just meet a guy you know isn’t good for you and all you want to do is bed him – it’s partly out of curiosity but also like adding him to your resume.”
Of course she went on to tell me she had only done it a couple of times; but at 20, I’m tempted to extrapolate. Well, women asked for liberalization and I guess they got more than they asked for. But this certainly isn’t just a woman thing. It’s a competitive market out there when it comes to relationships/love/marriage and the guys are totally making the most of it. I find the idea completely ludicrous but the truth is some women still think they can win men over with sex. They give up the goods early on to get his attention and that’s pretty much as far as they go with strategy. Everything from then on is free styled and they expect to keep the man?
Anyway, I think I’ve rambled on too long. There are certainly several salient points worthy of discussion in all I’ve written so far. However, I’d like to focus on one and for the benefit of those who may be completely naïve like me, I’d like to beg us to be as honest as possible with our responses. You are allowed to comment anonymously so please feel free to share.
Where do you stand on one-night-stands? Yes? No? Maybe? And Why? It’d be nice if you can elaborate with some examples, past experiences and so on. You know the drill, use the comment box and speak your mind.